Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . . The Book of Daze℠.
Your Virtual GanjaScope
A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.
The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.
There's a Saint for That
There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.
Here's to a Brighter Day
Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.
Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.
Chelsea Clinton Denies Posing for Mysterious Sculpture Mar 20, 2008 - 12:07
WEST CHESTER, PA—Former first child Chelsea Clinton denies she was the inspiration for a mysterious sculpture that appeared recently at the compound of Postcards from the Pug Bus, southeastern Pennsylvania's leading satire website.
"I'm a huge fan of the Pug Bus, but I haven't seen [the sculpture] yet—much less posed for it," said Ms. Clinton, 28, who was pimping for her mother outside Fennario, a West Chester coffeehouse much favored by Goth kids and slaphead university professors with sad gray ponytails.
Astonished local residents who have seen the sculpture on the 1.2-acre Pug Bus compound near the West Chester University campus were gobsmacked over its appearance.
"It looks like an Afghan hound in heat," said Jon Timmons, a kinesiology and home economics major, "or maybe a Tennessee walking horse with a stick up its ass."
"It's a dead ringer for Chelsea Clinton—only better looking because a horse face always looks better on a horse," said another observer wearing an Obama button who asked not to be identified.
Phil Maggitti, editor in briefs of Postcards from the Pug Bus, held a brief press conference in front of the horse yesterday.
"At first we thought the sumbitch had escaped from Burning Man," laughed Mr. Maggitti. "Then we figured some goddamn elementary school class had sneaked onto the compound Sunday night and put up another fucking memorial to Barbaro. They're all over this area, and before you can say "who gives a shit already," it will be derby time again."
Mr. Maggitti said he had no plans to remove the sculpture, though he would entertain offers for it.
"If somebody's looking to trade his kingdom for a horse, we've got just the thing for him."
Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."
The Pug Bus Interview
Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface, because no matter how beautiful a person might be on the inside, you've still got to look at him or her when you're speaking to 'em..Read on.