Postcards from the Pug Bus                    
   
   

postcards from the pug bus

  
lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004
Hillary Clinton blames her election loss on white supremacy
ex-Prince Harry and Whatsherface desperately seeking a nickname
Microsoft introduces new anal font "for assholes with something on their minds"
White women can't jump, either
Ashli Babbitt proved that . . . "bang, you're dead"
Happy New Year, same as the Old Year, from the alt right's favorite satire site
STAFF PICKS
four dogs in a row having sex from behind...
Whether you do it doggie style or scissors, sister, we've got suggestions for what to read when you're having a cigarette or a blunt afterward ...

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The Book of Daze℠
image of an old-fashion pinup calendar
Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . .  The Book of Daze℠.
 
 

Your Virtual GanjaScope
an image of a man smoking pot
A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.


The Grammar Prick
 
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.


There's a Saint for That
patron saints for hire image
There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.



      
image of iconic screaming person
      
two lions having it off
      
The Who shortly after pissing on a tall wall
      
American Freedm Party
      
burma shave sign with jingle
        
subliminal Coca-Cola advert
             
image of worldwide web on computer screen
     
image of bicyclist
  
image of handicapped parking sticker
      
man on his knees fucking a tail pipe
      
fly agaric mushroom

Here's to a Brighter Day
banner of brights organization
Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.


              
The Pug Bus Blogs On
seven pugs looking out the back of a Dodge Caravan whose hatch is raised
Our editor in briefs holds forth on why he doesn't want to be called a white person; the evil that is Mick Jagger; the rise of the alt-middle; and more!"

Yesterdays' Papers
image of a bunch of newspapers
Read any two of these classic articles from May 2005 and get the third one for free. Pay only for shipping and handling. Offer good while supplies last.

US Prepared for Flu Pandemic Says Bush
A case of deja vu in reverse or what?

Johnny Depp to Read at Hunter S. Thompson Memorial
Johnny wore a wife-beater then he became one.

Mena Suvari Seeks Separation from Mira Sorvino
So who'd you rather . . . or rather not.

Local News
West Chester University Golden Ram  image
West Chester, PA, is home to a public-embarrassment Jackass has-been; a woke university; and the goddamn QVC shopping headquarters. That should be good for a mean-spirited, condescending local news story from time to time.


Pug Bus Quizzes 'n' Polls
road sign with many directions
No rhetorical questions allowed. No penalties for guessing wrong. Find out just how much you do know about Schrödinger’s cat and other neat shit."



Postcards the Book
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The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs. Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-




You Can't Photoshop This
 

Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."

 

The Pug Bus Interview
image of phil maggitti, the pug bus editor
Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface, because no matter how beautiful a person might be on the inside, you've still got to look at him or her when you're speaking to 'em..Read on.


 
   

image of a gun Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.

 
 
  Jackass: Number 2 Sparks Muslim Leader's Outrage
        Sep 23, 2006 - 11:49
       
an image
WEST CHESTER, Penna. - After viewing Jackass: Number Two, the chief cleric of the Mosque of the Sacred Jihad called on Muslims in West Chester and around the world to bring down "the all-consuming wrath of Allah upon those who support this unspeakably perverted Western, homoerotic filth."

Quoting liberally from the darker passages of the Koran that moderate Muslims try to gloss over, Salam Hassan Al-Maharyati also warned theater owners "to stop glorifying this godless mockery at once" or face the consequences.

"Great shall be his reward who drives the infidel screaming and bloody from our midst," said Al-Maharyati. "He and his family shall enjoy the warmth and friendship of Allah in the next world"

        Local police are not taking these statements lightly.

"Sure, the Muslims are always going on about some-
thing," said West Chester chief of police, Edwin Sturtzenberger. "If it isn't a jihad against mandatory showers in girls gym class, it's a jihad against pork rinds in the vending machines at gas stations; but somebody Jell-oed three toilets in the men's room at the multiplex last night. Coincidence? I think not."

The Jackass crew—for all their onscreen willingness to taunt bulls, snakes, and other dangerous creatures, devise novel ways to risk injury to their penises, or employ their butts as comedy props—are not laughing about the cleric's threat.

A heavily disguised Bam Margera went unrecognized at a table toward the rear of Kooma, an Asian fusion restaurant in West Chester, the other day. A reporter who was supposed to meet Mr. Margera for dinner, said:

        "If he hadn't been arranging his sushi rolls in the shape of a dick on his plate, I wouldn't have recognized him. He doesn't look anything like he did the last time I saw him, and that was only two weeks ago.

"When his bodyguard took me into the men's room to strip search me, I thought it was part of a Jackass stunt until he put the latex glove on."

Mr. Margera, at least, is speaking to some trusted reporters willing to be strip searched. Johnny Knoxville, Chris Pontius, Steve-O, and Wee Man refused to return phone calls.

In other news, President George W. Bush used his weekly radio address to warn Americans that the death of Osama bin Laden would mean elevated terror-threat levels until "past the election, if not longer."
   

© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked.

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