Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . . The Book of Daze℠.
Your Virtual GanjaScope
A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.
The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.
There's a Saint for That
There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.
Here's to a Brighter Day
Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.
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Chelsea Clinton Nixes Questions about Trojan Horse Mar 27, 2008 - 1:09
***image2**WEST CHESTER, PA—Chelsea Clinton brings her girl-in-the-bubble tour to West Chester University this afternoon, and students have been warned that anyone who asks a question about the Trojan Horse on the Postcards from the Pug Bus compound nearby will be removed from the gathering by force if necessary and may face disciplinary action.
"We don't like to temper free speech unless we have to," said a member of the university's student affairs office, "but we don't want the kind of negative publicity Butler University got over that kid's question."
That kid—Butler student Evan Strange, 20, who works for the student newspaper, Dawgnet—asked Miss Clinton, 28, whether she thought the Lewinsky scandal had damaged her mother's credibility as a candidate. Miss Clinton told him petulantly that was none of his business.
Many people who have seen the Trojan Horse, which appeared mysteriously on the Pug Bus compound in the early hours of March 17, have said it bears a galloping resemblance to Miss Clinton, who has been pimping for her mother on college campuses across the country.
"I don't want to beat a dead horse," said Biff Scuzzy, special events correspondent for the Pug Bus, "but maybe she's biased against anyone from a publication known as Dawgnet, after all, Rush Limbaugh did refer to Miss Clinton as the White House dog when she was thirteen. She might have learned to walk off lead in the meantime, but she sure as fuck hasn't gotten any prettier."
Mr. Scuzzy's crudeness might be forgiven in someone who was born with post traumatic stress disorder, but others less challenged are equally offended by Miss Clinton's refusal to take questions from reporters. Recently she blew off a Cedar Rapids, Iowa, fourth grader and "kid reporter" for Scholastic News who merely asked if Miss Clinton thought her father "would be a good 'first man' in the White House."
How touchy is that? It's not like the kid asked how Chelsea's mommy's going to like working in the same office where Monica Lewinsky hummed "Hail to the Chief" while sucking on an Altoid, among other things.
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The Pug Bus Interview
Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface, because no matter how beautiful a person might be on the inside, you've still got to look at him or her when you're speaking to 'em..Read on.