Postcards from the Pug Bus                    

postcards from the pug bus

lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004
Hillary Clinton blames her election loss on white supremacy
ex-Prince Harry and Whatsherface desperately seeking a nickname
Microsoft introduces new anal font "for assholes with something on their minds"
White women can't jump, either
Ashli Babbitt proved that . . . "bang, you're dead"
Happy New Year, same as the Old Year, from the alt right's favorite satire site
four dogs in a row having sex from behind...
Whether you do it doggie style or scissors, sister, we've got suggestions for what to read when you're having a cigarette or a blunt afterward ...

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The Book of Daze℠
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Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . .  The Book of Daze℠.

Your Virtual GanjaScope
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A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.

The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.

There's a Saint for That
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There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.

image of iconic screaming person
two lions having it off
The Who shortly after pissing on a tall wall
American Freedm Party
burma shave sign with jingle
subliminal Coca-Cola advert
image of worldwide web on computer screen
image of bicyclist
image of handicapped parking sticker
man on his knees fucking a tail pipe
fly agaric mushroom

Here's to a Brighter Day
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Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.

The Pug Bus Blogs On
seven pugs looking out the back of a Dodge Caravan whose hatch is raised
Our editor in briefs holds forth on why he doesn't want to be called a white person; the evil that is Mick Jagger; the rise of the alt-middle; and more!"

Yesterdays' Papers
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Read any two of these classic articles from May 2005 and get the third one for free. Pay only for shipping and handling. Offer good while supplies last.

US Prepared for Flu Pandemic Says Bush
A case of deja vu in reverse or what?

Johnny Depp to Read at Hunter S. Thompson Memorial
Johnny wore a wife-beater then he became one.

Mena Suvari Seeks Separation from Mira Sorvino
So who'd you rather . . . or rather not.

Local News
West Chester University Golden Ram  image
West Chester, PA, is home to a public-embarrassment Jackass has-been; a woke university; and the goddamn QVC shopping headquarters. That should be good for a mean-spirited, condescending local news story from time to time.

Pug Bus Quizzes 'n' Polls
road sign with many directions
No rhetorical questions allowed. No penalties for guessing wrong. Find out just how much you do know about Schrödinger’s cat and other neat shit."

Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs. Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-

You Can't Photoshop This

Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."


The Pug Bus Interview
image of phil maggitti, the pug bus editor
Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface, because no matter how beautiful a person might be on the inside, you've still got to look at him or her when you're speaking to 'em..Read on.


image of a gun Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.

  Raffaele Sollecito Eager to Step Out of Amanda Knox's Shadow
        Oct 3, 2011 - 10:07
        PERUGIA, Italy - No matter what happens when an Italian court reaches a verdict in the appeals trial of Raffaele Sollecito and Amanda Knox today, Mr. Sollecito says he is ready to be "my own man (un uomo con grandi testicoli)," not "a puppy on a leash," as he has been called by the Italian press.

Two years ago Mr. Sollecito and Ms. Knox were found guilty of the murder of British exchange student Meredith Kercher. Ms. Kercher had been found dead on November 1, 2007, in the house she shared with Ms. Knox and two other women in this university town. Ms. Kercher, then 21, had been stabbed repeatedly and her throat had been slashed.

Italian authorities quickly decided that Mr. Sollecito had held Ms. Kercher from behind while Ms. Knox stabbed her, and another man tried to assault her sexually. The other man, Ivorian immigrant Rudy Guede, was convicted for his part in the murder and sentenced to thirty years in prison, a sentence that was later reduced to sixteen years on appeal.

Although Ms. Knox and Mr. Sollecito were lovers and co-defendants, Ms. Knox, a late-blooming American exchange student from Seattle, got all the attention in the press. She was described as a "sex-crazed woman (puttana sesso-folle)" and a "drugged-up tart (una ragazza con una vagina sporca)" and worse.

        Mr. Sollecito—then 23 and three years older than Ms. Knox—was described as a fey, Harry Potter lookalike (e forse un segreto omosessuale) who was already Ms. Knox's lap dog even though they had known each other only six days at the time of the murder. He received a twenty-five-year sentence; she got twenty-six years. Both have been in prison while awaiting their appeals trial.

"Raffaele isn't as worried about remaining in prison as he is about the damage to his manhood," said Umberto Del Grasso, a friend of Mr. Sollecito. "He is also furious that he was portrayed in the press as a virgin (una vergine con un pene piccolo) at the time he met Amanda."

When Ms. Knox made her final statement to the judges who will decide her fate today, she portrayed herself as someone incapable of such a crime. Mr. Sollecito, who appeared in court with a do-it-yourself buzz cut and construction boots, used his address to brag about his growing collection of Japanese pornography, his knives, and all the women he had known before Ms. Knox. He also showed off his newly buff physique and the prison tattoos on his chest.

"I am not the little baby (uomo che bacia un pene) that people say I am," declared Mr. Sollecito. "You might take away my freedom, but you can't take away my manhood (gigantesco pene palpitante della morte)."

        Then Mr. Sollecito dramatically ripped off a bracelet he had been wearing, which bore the inscription, "Free Raffaele and Amanda." He threw the bracelet to the floor, grabbed his crotch, then stomped on the bracelet.

"I don't need any stinking bracelet to make me free. I am already free, free of the lies the press spread about me."

He concluded by saying that he had been at home all night when Ms. Kercher was murdered.

"I was smoking marijuana with three whores and downloading movies from Pirate Bay."

© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked.

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