postcards from the pug bus
lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004
Hillary Clinton blames her election loss on white supremacy
ex-Prince Harry and Whatsherface desperately seeking a nickname
Microsoft introduces new anal font "for assholes with something on their minds"
White women can't jump, either
Ashli Babbitt proved that . . . "bang, you're dead"
Happy New Year, same as the Old Year, from the alt right's favorite satire site
STAFF PICKS
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...Whether you do it doggie style or scissors, sister, we've got suggestions for what to read when you're having a cigarette or a blunt afterward ...
(1) Charlotte Church Sobriety Checklist, an angel vomits on her halo;
(2) Jesus Puts the Population of Heaven at 150, lots of room for social distancing;
(3) New Royals Book Lifts Lid Off Queen Eizabeth's Underwear
(2) Jesus Puts the Population of Heaven at 150, lots of room for social distancing;
(3) New Royals Book Lifts Lid Off Queen Eizabeth's Underwear
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The Book of Daze℠
Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . . The Book of Daze℠.
Your Virtual GanjaScope
A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.
The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.
There's a Saint for That
There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.
Here's to a Brighter Day
Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.
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AVMA Promotes Medical Marijuana for Pets
Oct 27, 2011 - 5:07
"The potential for income-stream maximization is awesome," said AVMA president Jennifer Cagna, DVM. "The more veterinary practices that offer medical marijuana, the more money veterinarians will earn." Medical marijuana for humans is currently prescribed to alleviate the nausea and vomiting that accompany many disease conditions and their treatments. It is also used to stimulate hunger in chemotherapy and AIDS patients, to lower intraocular eye pressure in those suffering from glaucoma, to aid the hearing-impaired by increasing their ability to perceive words more clearly in social situations, and to promote a sense of well-being among persons with persistent depression. "Our pets are afflicted with similar conditions," said Dr. Cagna, "and they can enjoy the same benefits from the use of marijuana that humans currently do." She added that administering medical marijuana to pets is not really that different from sitting around getting the cat stoned. "We realize that a certain percentage of our clients smoke pot, so they're already comfortable with the notion of blowing smoke in kitty's face. That's a ready-made market to which we have the inside track. All we have to do is offer our clients lower prices and promote the added value of legality when you buy from a veterinarian." The AVMA has not neglected pet owners who do not smoke pot. "We can offer our non-smoking clients the AVMA's patented Medical Marijuana Delivery System for Pets (MMDSP)," said Dr. Cagna.
Dr. Cagna estimated that the MMDSP will retail for "about $149.95," depending on location. It can be purchased individually or bundled with an electronic air-freshening unit." © The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked. |
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