Postcards from the Pug Bus                    
   
   

postcards from the pug bus

  
lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004
Phil Spector died for O.J.'s sins
Who is "Dr." Jill fooling with that bogus educator nonsense?
The woman teaches remedial fucking English
at a stinking community college
Truly amazing, but at least it's a step up
from her former gig as Queen of the Stone Balloon
Happy New Year, same as the Old Year, from the alt right's favorite satire site
STAFF PICKS
four dogs in a row having sex from behind...
Whether you do it doggie style or scissors, sister, we've got suggestions for what to read when you're having a cigarette or a blunt afterward ...

Home   Ass Hats   Celebrities   Music   U.S. News   World   Religion   Sports   Technology   Weed   Us  

The Book of Daze℠
image of an old-fashion pinup calendar
Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . .  The Book of Daze℠.
 
 

Your Virtual GanjaScope
an image of a man smoking pot
A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.


The Grammar Prick
 
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.


There's a Saint for That
patron saints for hire image
There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.



      
image of iconic screaming person
      
two lions having it off
      
The Who shortly after pissing on a tall wall
      
American Freedm Party
      
burma shave sign with jingle
        
subliminal Coca-Cola advert
             
image of worldwide web on computer screen
     
image of bicyclist
  
image of handicapped parking sticker
      
man on his knees fucking a tail pipe
      
fly agaric mushroom

Here's to a Brighter Day
banner of brights organization
Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.


              
The Pug Bus Blogs On
seven pugs looking out the back of a Dodge Caravan whose hatch is raised
Our editor in briefs holds forth on why he doesn't want to be called a white person; the evil that is Mick Jagger; the rise of the alt-middle; and more!"

Yesterdays' Papers
image of a bunch of newspapers
Read any two of these classic articles from May 2005 and get the third one for free. Pay only for shipping and handling. Offer good while supplies last.

US Prepared for Flu Pandemic Says Bush
A case of deja vu in reverse or what?

Johnny Depp to Read at Hunter S. Thompson Memorial
Johnny wore a wife-beater then he became one.

Mena Suvari Seeks Separation from Mira Sorvino
So who'd you rather . . . or rather not.

Local News
West Chester University Golden Ram  image
West Chester, PA, is home to a public-embarrassment Jackass has-been; a woke university; and the goddamn QVC shopping headquarters. That should be good for a mean-spirited, condescending local news story from time to time.


Pug Bus Quizzes 'n' Polls
road sign with many directions
No rhetorical questions allowed. No penalties for guessing wrong. Find out just how much you do know about Schrödinger’s cat and other neat shit."



Postcards the Book
image
The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs. Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-




You Can't Photoshop This
 

Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."

 

The Pug Bus Interview
image of phil maggitti, the pug bus editor
Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface, because no matter how beautiful a person might be on the inside, you've still got to look at him or her when you're speaking to 'em..Read on.


 
   

image of a gun Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.

 
 
  St. Agatha of Palermo, Patron Saint of Breast Implants and Barbecue
        Aug 3, 2013 - 10:31
       
an image
WEST CHESTER, Pa.–Next to the Blessed Virgin Mary's breasts—which no one but the Holy Ghost and the infant Jesus has ever seen—the hooters of St. Agatha of Palermo are the most famous and most venerated in all of christendom.

"Mary's breasts are given titular respect," says Emilio Cacasodo, S.J., "After all, she is the mother of Jesus, but St. Agatha's cioccie, mio dio, they are truly objects to be venerated."

St. Agatha's melons are certainly a case of less being more, for they were cut off at the order of the magistrate Quinctianus of Sicily after the young and virginal Agatha refused to accept an internship at Leccacazzi, Palermo'a most exclusive brothel.

       
an image
After telling Quinctianus that she would not work in a brothel because her breasts belonged to god alone, Agatha, 15, wound up with her tits in a wringer, and they were eventually removed. She was returned to prison following her mastectomy. There, according to legend, her balloons were restored to their former glory by St. Peter in the world's first recorded breast augmentation.

When Decius, the emperor of Rome, learned about this miracle, he ordered Agatha to be rolled over hot coals and burned at the stake. She died in 253 C.E. after uttering her final words, "My cups runneth over." Her breasts, which survived the fire, were buried at a secret location.

       
an image
During the centuries following St. Agatha's martyrdom, her breasts have attracted a large and devoted following—especially among young catholic boys—and countless miracles have been attributed to them. Each year hundreds of thousands of pilgrims travel to the shrine of St. Agatha, located in a grotto outside Palermo, to touch a likeness of the breasts of St. Agatha carved in stone.

       
an image
In addition to being the patron saint of breast implants, St. Agatha is also the patron saint of breast-cancer survivors and grill marks. Moreover, because of the exquisite shape of her breasts, Agatha is the patron saint of bell-founders and bakers.

To celebrate Agatha's feast day each year, Sicilian bakers produce the famous poppe cakes in the shape of Agatha's bajongas. The most outstanding of these are consecrated and distributed as communion at a mass in her honor.
   

© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked.

Humor Feed Banner
Red Bull Logo