Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We surely don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, visit . . . The Book of Daze℠.
Your Daily Ganjascope
A half-century's worth of smoking pot has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit Ganjascopes
The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive or if you dare misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.
Discordian Convention Coming to West Chester, PA Aug 16, 2019 - 7:06
WEST CHESTER,PAOnce known as The Athens of the East, this leafy college borough is bidding fair to become San Francisco East. Step one was the recent passage of a legally questionable ban on plastic bags. Step two, which preceded step one, as logic often does in colleges and their surroundings, is the number of students for whom urinating in public is the norm, especially in the middle reaches of S. Walnut Street. The final step was a proclamation yesterday by Dianne Herrin, West Chester's mayor, declaring that West Chester will host the 2020 Discordian International Convention.
"We are proud to announce that literally hundreds of Discordians will visit us for their quasi-annual convention, scheduled from February 28 through 29 next year."
Discordianism is the "religion of chaos, of causing maximum cognitive confusion in order to spark creative thinking outside the box of dogma" (or "Box of Rain" to Deadheads).
Now available in the remainder bins of non-discriminating book sellers everywhere.
The foundational text of Discordianism, The Principia Discordia, was written in, on, or about 1963 by Malaclypse the Younger and Omar Khayyam Ravenhurst, who were inspired to create Discordianism while tripping balls in a bowling alley.
A copy of the first edition of the Principia Discordia was "believed to have been discovered in the John F. Kennedy Assassination Records Collection in the National Archives" by Rev. Dr. Jon Swabey. This belief, like any other, may or may not be held by the majority of Discordians or by any Discordians at all. Indeed, many outside (as well as inside) observers still regard Discordianism as a parody religion, although some of its adherents insist it is a parity religion or a metaphor that describes an umstritten meditational technique.
Convention packages, identification badges, and 3-D glasses (some assembly required, batteries not included) can be requested from the CCHS events coordinator or from the Hotel Warner reservations desk. No COD's from Canada, please.
Our editor in briefs holds forth on why he doesn't want to be called a white person; the evil that is Mick Jagger; and more!"
West Chester, PA, is home to a public-embarrassment Jackass has-been; a virtue-signalling, marching-band ex-normal school; and the goddamn QVC shopping headquarters. That should be good for a mean-spirited, condescending local news story from time to time.
The Pug Bus Quiz Challenge
No rhetorical questions allowed. No penalties for guessing wrong. Find out just how much you do know about Schrödinger’s cat and other neat shit."
Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs. Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.