Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . . The Book of Daze℠.
Your Virtual GanjaScope
A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.
The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.
There's a Saint for That
There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.
Here's to a Brighter Day
Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.
Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.
The Grammar Prick's Lockdown Lessons Dec 10, 2020 - 6:06
I hope you boys and girls have been wearing your masks and practicing social distancing. Remember, good masks make good neighbors,and anyone who gets within six feet of you is trying to sell you something. While you're staying quietly in your rooms, here's a quiz to keep you amused. C'mon, you can't look at porn and play video games and troll the dark web all day.
We'll grapple with the meanings of dilemma, false dilemma, Catch-22, Sophie's choice, and buckdancer's choice. The following quiz will help to keep you from tripping over your tongue when using these terms.
1. A dilemma is . . . a) discernible by its vestigial horns, b) a choice between two or more options, all of which are about as attractive as pink eye, c) what you're in when you come home smelling like cheap wine and pussy, d) in the eye of the beholder.
2. A false dilemma is . . . a) one in which all the choices have herpes, b) the root of all evil, c) a situation in which only two choices are considered or presented when there are other choices available, d) believing you have only one slot left on speed dial when actually you have two.
3. Catch-22 is . . . a) a logical paradox arising from a situation in which an individual needs something that can only be acquired by not being in that very situation, b) Joseph Heller's only good novel, c) best remembered for the full frontal nudity of the movie version, d) military slang for hashish.
4. Sophie's choice is . . . a) cyanide or strychnine, b) not really a choice but a death wish, c) yet another movie for which Meryl Streep did not win an Oscar, d) a choice between two persons or things that will result in the death or destruction of the person or thing not chosen
5. Buckdancer's choice is . . . a) played in the key of C, b) a singer's decision to ignore requests and to play what he wants to play, c) the name of Rick Perry's hunting camp, d) the fallacy of making the same choice repeatedly and expecting a different result each time.
Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."
The Pug Bus Interview
Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface, because no matter how beautiful a person might be on the inside, you've still got to look at him or her when you're speaking to 'em..Read on.