postcards from the pug bus
lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004

Welcome to the Alt-Middle's favorite satire site
What sort of fool brings a knife to a gun fight?
Election 2020: a never was vs. a never should be...make your vote count, don't vote, it's a mope's game
“The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.” (Winston Churchill)
Let's defund the parking meter police
What doesn't kill you will weaken you
So how does felt experience arise out of non-sentient matter, anyway?
"Che stronzi sono le persone." (T. Soprano)

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The Book of Daze℠
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Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We surely don't. National Find a Rainbow Day? Fuck that, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else bothers to celebrate, visit . . . The Book of Daze℠.

Your Daily Ganjascope
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Sagittarius (11/22 - 12/21): Your love of Calypso's Grape Fizz live resin carts conspire to produce a full-blown paradoxical reaction to life. Whenever you vape it up, dandruff shampoo turns you into a blizzard with feet. Cough medication makes you hack and sputter like a flooded outboard motor. Deodorant produces a rancid, road-kill aroma about your personal zones. I'd lay off the Beano, contraceptive devices, and hemorrhoid preparations if I were you. More Ganjascopes

The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a dried-up, old-biddy Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive or if you dare misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.

Postcards the Book
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The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs. Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-

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Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."

The Fuck It List
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Ten Things You Should Quit While Not Going Gently into That Good Night

  1. Organized Religion
  2. Voting
  3. Seat Belts
  4. Making Sure Your Zipper's Up
  5. Paying for Music and Movies
  6. Apologizing for Shit You Didn't Do
  7. Pissing Indoors All the Time
  8. Hauling Your Damn Grandkids Around
  9. Stupid-Ass, Dip-Shit, Old-Fart Hats
10. Bathing or Showering Regularly

One-Hit Wonders Quiz
Sep 28, 2020 - 6:30
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WEST GOSHEN, PA—Where would the music industry, popular culture, or the fate of the universe itself be without the one-hit wonder (OHW)—pop music's most prodigious benefactor, the artist who keeps on giving even after he or she or they or it is no longer selling and is setting the GPS for Branson.

Yet there is power in the relevance of the irrelevant, my fellow babies, and much to be admired in those who dared to be forgotten. In their honor we present this quiz. (Trigger warning: there are wrong answers, lots of them, just like in real life, watch your ass.)

1. Which OHW of the 1950s contained the following lyrics: "Sha na na na, sha na na na, na, Dip dip dip dip dip dip dip . . ."? a) all of them, b) every other one, c) "Get a Job" (1958), d) "Heartbreak Hotel" (1955)

2. The forgotten entity who sang the OHW "Judy in Disguise (With Glasses)" (1968) used which of his names as his stage name? a) his first and middle, b) his middle and ring, c) his surname only, d) what was his name again?

3. Where the hell had everyone gone in Jonathan King's 1965 OWH "Everyone's Gone to the ____"? Were they at ... a) the disco, b) the hop, c) the sugar shack, d) the moon

4. In their 1970 OWH "One Toke Over the Line," Brewer & Shipley were stuck momentarily in ... a) despair, b) Alice's Restaurant, c) a railway station, d) Mobile with the Memphis Blues Again

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5. The woman in Thomas Dolby's 1982 OHW blinded Mr. Robertson (Mr. Dolby's real name) with ... a) her tits, b) science, c) a ray gun, d) the truth

6. Everything but the Girl, who gave us the OHW "Missing" in 1996, took their name from a _______ a) furniture store advert, b) gay men's club promotion, c) macabre children's game, d) bucket list

7. The Baha Men, who came to and just as quickly left prominence with their 2000 OHW "Who Let the Dogs Out?" play a style of music known as a) junkanoo, b) junk in your trunk, c) Christian calypso, d) MOR Negro

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8. "Nothing Compares 2 U" was her 1990 OHW, and nothing certainly did. Soon she went batshit crazy and was served with restraining orders by several large cities. Her name is _______. a) Amy Winehouse, b) Britney Spears, c) Lauren Hill, d) Sinead O'Connor

9. David Fenton, who wrote the OHW "Turning Japanese" (1980) for The Vapors, has denied that the song is about a) turning Japanese, b) masturbation, c) Hiroshima birth defects, d) anything in particular

10. What color was the tambourine in The Lemon Pipers 1968 OHW "My Green Tambourine"? a) chocolate/pesto, b) lemon, c) Sahara sandstone, d) green
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West Chester, PA, is home to a public-embarrassment Jackass has-been; a virtue-signalling, marching-band university; and the goddamn QVC shopping headquarters. That should be good for a stupid local news story from time to time.

The Pug Bus Blogs On
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Our editor in briefs holds forth on why he doesn't want to be called a white person; the evil that is Mick Jagger; and more!"

The Pug Bus Quiz Challenge
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No rhetorical questions allowed. No penalties for guessing wrong. Find out just how much you do know about Schrödinger’s cat and other neat shit."

The Pug Bus Interview
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Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface.Read on.

Sites for Sore Eyes
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Discordianism--the one religion to have if you're having more than one—or or if you're having none at all.

High Times--wanna know what Super Silver Haze is going for near you? Wanna wade your way through a growing shit heap of trendy, female-empowered, social warrior nonsense to find out?

Pirate Bay--indefatigible, unsinkable, and attitude out the ass; still the one-stop shoplifting stop

Soulseek--no spoofs, no lurkers, just good clean music files for free. To hell with those overpriced streaming services. As the Buddha says, "Stream your own shit, mother-fucker."

Spectrum Labs-need to pass a piss test?

Vaults of Erowid-before you drop it, chop it, snort it, or vape it, consult the druggie's bible; your brain with thank you for the effort

ExpressVPN--sturdy, impregnable fortress. It's the VPN service that we here at the Pug Bus use. Don't go digital shoplifting without it.