title of web site: postcards from the pug bus
 
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Your 420 Ganjascope

Presenting the astrological world's first Ganjascope, a timeless foretelling that reveals your past, present, and future at once. We take the logical out of astrological


The Fuck It List

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Ten Things You Should Fllip the Bird to Before You Die

  1. Religion
  2. Voting
  3. Seat Belts
  4. FOX News
  5. Paying for Music and Movies
  6. Your Bucket List
  7. Pissing Indoors
  8. Hugging
  9. Stupid-ass Old Fart Hats
10. Going to Bed Early


The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a powdery-smelling, dried-up, old-biddy English teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive. Visit The Grammar Prick

Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-


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Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.

A Barrel of Laughs at the Gastroenterology Office: You Can't Photoshop This
Aug 12, 2019 - 8:36
an image
WEST GOSHEN, Pa.—When was the last time you had a good laugh in the gastroenterology office? A really good laugh, not some tight-ass snortle, but a full-on, stuff-coming-out-your-nose production? I didn't think so. There’s more laughter at funerals than at the gastro’s. Of course people who attend funerals usually don’t spend the night before shoving M80s up their asses and doing Drano shots.

For whatever reason, people in the gastro’s appear to take their butts seriously. Their expressions are sphincter grim, and their voices decorously split the difference between a funeral director’s and a golf announcer’s elocutionary style.

I was dropping someone off at the gastro’s last week, synchronizing cell phones for a later pickup, when I noticed the banner hanging above the check-in counter, “Ask us today about our Patient Portal.”

Upon seeing the banner I was consumed with projectile laughing. Wave after wave of unseemly, uncontrollable, orgasmic howling the likes of which I hadn't seen since the last time I did mushrooms.

(If astronomers want to know what happened before the Big Bang, may I suggest that someone saw a funny-ass sign in a gastro’s office on an otherwise routine afternoon and, if you’ll pardon the expression, lost his shit.)

"Fuck me swinging," I thought. "Ain't no portals in here I'm particularly inspired to ask about." I could barely finish coordinating with the person whom I was to return for later. (She, I might add, was not amused at my amusement.)

I rounded up what was left of my composure and was about to make a semi-dignified retreat when the nurse said to the person who was getting more annoyed with me by the minute, “Don’t worry, ma’am, you’ll be able to make the call after you wake up.”

“Probably butt-dial it," I thought, crabbing my way toward the door as if I needed a rest room.


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© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked. Have a secular day.


Back by Unpopular Demand
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Read any two articles, get the third one free!

Norton Internet Security Won't Let Customers Uninstall

President-elect Trump Praises Pug Bus for Official English Policy

Pippa Middleton's Ass Not All It's Cracked Up to Be

The Pug Bus Interview
phil maggitti smoking a joint, isn't that shocking now?Smoke 'em if you got 'em, then enjoy the interviews nobody else has the onions to do. We're not just blowing smoke. Our fearless interviewer isn't afraid to stop totally at the surface.Read on.
Trends That Need Killing
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This farm-to-table shit is so 2002, yet like the undead it lives on. Let's put a fork in it. The next time some dipshit waiter begins telling you where your lamb chop came from, tell him to piss off. You want dinner, not a fucking geography lesson.

Contact Us and Win a Prize
image of a beat up, rusty old mailboxHey, Skippy. Here's your big chance. Let us know what you think or if you think. You know you want to. Go ahead. We dare you. We might even print your stinking letter. Send email to Pug Bus Editor. Send regular mail—and win a guaranteed prize worth as much as $1—to Postcards from the Pug Bus, 1379 Dilworthtown Xing, Suite 207, West Chester, PA 19382


Sites for Sore Eyes
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Discordianism--the one religion to have if you're having more than one—or none at all.

High Times--wanna know what Super Silver Haze is selling for near you?

Pirate Bay--indefatigible, unsinkable, and attitude out the ass; still the one-stop shoplifting stop

Soulseek--no spoofs, no lurkers, just good clean music files for free. To hell with those overpriced streaming services. As the Buddha says, "Stream your own shit, mother-fucker."

Spectrum Labs-need to pass a piss test?

Vaults of Erowid-before you drop it, chop it, snort it, or vape it, consult the druggie's bible; your brain with thank you for the effort

ExpressVPN--sturdy, impregnable fortress. It's the VPN service that we here at the Pug Bus use. Don't go digital shoplifting without it


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