title of web site: postcards from the pug bus
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Deplorably Speaking
Our deplorable editor in briefs holds forth on a variety of topics from the ruination of sports to the frog-marching of male college students to the idiocies of third-wave feminism to whatever.
The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a powdery-smelling, dried-up, old-hag English teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive. Visit The Grammar Prick

Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-

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Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous and frightening to mention.

Meet Our Illustrious Staff
Jan 25, 2006 - 9:33

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Phil Maggitti, editor in briefs, is a retired freelance writer and editor living in a land of virtual reality with his wife, two Boston terriers, one cat, the ashes of a dozen or so former pets, and a constant supply of Noosa yoghurt. Phil has written nine books and more than 800 articles in the last three decades. He spent most of his time prior to that in a drug-induced stupor, honing his craft and courting his muse, who rejected him.

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Biff Scuzzy, our special events correspondent, is from Altoona, Pennsylvania, though not as far from it as some people in Altoona might prefer. Biff, whose Christian name has been revoked, attended Bryn Mawr and Princeton before taking a degree from Goldey Beacom Virtual University in Harlingen, Texas. Goldey Beacom has asked him repeatedly to return the degree, but to no avail. Biff is a regular contributor to the delinquency of minors.

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Chip Hilton, cultural affairs desk editor, is a talented but fragile waif who was named after an impossibly noble fictional sports hero of the 1950s. Chip is a bipolar, bimodal, biweekly contributor to this site. His byline has also appeared on the lavatory walls of some of this country's finest men's—and women's—rooms. His latest book, Flattery is the Best Policy, is available in the remainder bins of nondiscriminating bookstores everywhere.

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Buckner Wheat, our Chicago correspondent, is a native Texan and aspiring Canadian. After spending seven years as a Trappist monk, he was suddenly asked to leave when he was caught sneaking a Thorazine drip into Mass. He began piano studies at the age of eight and has been sighted performing his musical comedy act at various disreputable clubs in Chicago. His heroes are St. Therese, Janis Joplin, and Judge Judy.

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Matthew Strachan, our senior UK correspondent emeritus, was born in London and studied music at Dartington College of Arts and later at London University. He has composed rather a lot of television music over the years, including the various bleeps, tunes, and underscores for the international hit Who Wants to be a Millionaire. Since then he has bummed around in Nashville, TN, a lot and has spent much of his time down there being too afraid to enter certain diners. He has one wife, one daughter, but no longer has a rabbit.

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© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked. Have a secular day.

The Gift of GAB
image of GAB avatarA pox on those social justice warriors and you too, GoDaddy. We know who your daddy is. GAB is making a comeback. Can the South be far behind?
Back by Unpopular Demand
image of phil maggitti standing next to a sign that reads last chance
Read any two articles, get the third one free!
Norton Internet Security Won't Let Customers Uninstall
Trump Praises Pug Bus for Official English Policy
Pippa Middleton's Ass Not All It's Cracked Up to Be

What Would Neitzsche Do?
image of F. NeitzscheForget Jesus H. Christ. Who gives a shit, besides Carson Wentz, what Jesus would do? In order to survive in a postmodern world, ask what would Neitzsche do.

The Pug Bus Interview
phil maggitti smoking a joint, isn't that shocking now?Smoke 'em if you got 'em, then enjoy the interviews nobody else has the balls to do. We're not just blowing smoke. Our fearless interviewer isn't afraid to stop totally at the surface.Read on.

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