Postcards from the Pug Bus                    

postcards from the pug bus

lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004
Phil Spector died for O.J.'s sins
Who is "Dr." Jill fooling with that bogus educator nonsense?
The woman teaches remedial fucking English
at a stinking community college
Truly amazing, but at least it's a step up
from her former gig as Queen of the Stone Balloon
Happy New Year, same as the Old Year, from the alt right's favorite satire site
four dogs in a row having sex from behind...
Whether you do it doggie style or scissors, sister, we've got suggestions for what to read when you're having a cigarette or a blunt afterward ...

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The Book of Daze℠
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Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . .  The Book of Daze℠.

Your Virtual GanjaScope
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A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.

The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.

There's a Saint for That
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There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.

image of iconic screaming person
two lions having it off
The Who shortly after pissing on a tall wall
American Freedm Party
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subliminal Coca-Cola advert
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image of bicyclist
image of handicapped parking sticker
man on his knees fucking a tail pipe
fly agaric mushroom

Here's to a Brighter Day
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Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.

The Pug Bus Blogs On
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Our editor in briefs holds forth on why he doesn't want to be called a white person; the evil that is Mick Jagger; the rise of the alt-middle; and more!"

Yesterdays' Papers
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Read any two of these classic articles from May 2005 and get the third one for free. Pay only for shipping and handling. Offer good while supplies last.

US Prepared for Flu Pandemic Says Bush
A case of deja vu in reverse or what?

Johnny Depp to Read at Hunter S. Thompson Memorial
Johnny wore a wife-beater then he became one.

Mena Suvari Seeks Separation from Mira Sorvino
So who'd you rather . . . or rather not.

Local News
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West Chester, PA, is home to a public-embarrassment Jackass has-been; a woke university; and the goddamn QVC shopping headquarters. That should be good for a mean-spirited, condescending local news story from time to time.

Pug Bus Quizzes 'n' Polls
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No rhetorical questions allowed. No penalties for guessing wrong. Find out just how much you do know about Schrödinger’s cat and other neat shit."

Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs. Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-

You Can't Photoshop This

Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."


The Pug Bus Interview
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Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface, because no matter how beautiful a person might be on the inside, you've still got to look at him or her when you're speaking to 'em..Read on.


image of a gun Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.

  Math, Gravity, and Speed Limits Reek of White Supremacy
        Aug 22, 2020 - 6:42
an image
WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.—Brooklyn College Professor of Math Education Laurie Rubel proclaimed recently on Twitter that the mathematical equation 2+2=4 “reeks of white supremacist patriarchy. The idea that math (or data) is culturally neutral or in any way objective is a MYTH.”

Professor All Caps, for whom 2+2 has not equaled four in a long time, reeks of White Woman Syndrome (W2S), a psycho-sexual impairment that drives its victims to see good where none exists in men with skin tones darker than their own ... and to recognize little if any good in men von ihrer eigenen Art.

As fascinating and droll as W2S can be, we are here to follow the breadcrumbs, to see where the idea that math (or data) is not "culturally neutral or in any way objective" might lead ... and whose innocent wells it might poison.

To begin: if math is racist, what about gravity? Could anything be more white supremacist, patriarchal, or just plain hairy-ass bad than gravity?

Gravity is cold, stern, distant, unforgiving, emotionally unavailable, and doesn't give a shit about your feelings. It was discovered by Isaac Newton, a privileged white male who was a mathematician. That made him a white supremacist bastard already. Besides, black males have been victimized by gravity in disproportionate numbers since the day they decided belts had better uses than securing one's pants at a civilized level.

Someone of Professor Rubel's bent—ingrown left—would no doubt slap the white supremacy label on speed limits, too. They're based on numbers, after all; and policemen, as everybody knows, are died-in-the-blue racists.

        Double whammy there, Summer; but if that isn't enough to float your non-binary little man in the boat, the gentlemen who invented the radar gun—John L. Barker Sr. and Ben Midlock--were white, pussy-grabbing males.

Although we consider Professor Dipstick's proclamations about math to be as worthless as the $20 bill George Floyd was trying to pass, others are not so perceptive. Indeed, the professor's asshole tweet was retweeted by several asshole academics at universities and colleges around the nation. These educationists argue that “objective truth” is a social construct.

It would be gratifying to say that Professor Rubel's students see her for the posturing d-bag that she is. This, however, is not the case. Most of the eight reviews available for Professor Rubel on the Rate Your Professor website were "awesomely" favorable. That's a kick in the shorts because this woman teaches people who are going to be teachers, too, and who might go charging off into the world on non-white horses of their own. What we're learning about the coronavirus should give us an idea of how fast and far this sort of no-objective-reality thinking can spread.

In closing: if you're one of those conservatives who still believes in silver linings, try this: one of the more grounded of the Nutty Professor's students wrote, "I do not feel comfortable expressing my political views, which are clearly different from hers. I am just getting through, writing a paper that she acts like is the end of the world, and I will finish and get away from her and all the dogma of brooklyn college and teach the REAL WORLD."

Better start teaching there soon, daughter, the real world is disappearing fast.

© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked.

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