Postcards from the Pug Bus                
   
   

postcards from the pug bus

  
lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004
The chief obstacle to understanding the human brain is the human brain
"The peace and order of society is of more importance than even the relief of the miserable." Adam Smith
STAFF PICKS
four dogs in a row having sex from behind...
Whether you do it doggie style or scissors, sister, we've got suggestions for what to read when you're having a cigarette or a blunt afterward ...

Home   Ass Hats   Celebrities   Music   U.S. News   World   Religion   Sports   Technology   Weed   Us  

The Book of Daze℠
image of an old-fashion pinup calendar
Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We don't. National Take Your Grand Kid Out to Lunch Day? Fuck that, and your grand kid, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else has the imagination to celebrate, days like National Ain't Woke, Do Not Disturb Day℠, National Ignore the Ban on Plastic Straws Day℠, and others visit . . .  The Book of Daze℠.
 
 

Your Virtual GanjaScope
an image of a man smoking pot
A half-century's worth of smoking pot/hash/shatter/live resin carts has led us to conclude that horoscopes are more fun and more accurate when you're stoned...and they're even better when the person who wrote them was stoned, too. If you're looking to turn over a new leaf, visit GanjaScope.


The Grammar Prick
 
Meaner than a 250-pound lesbian Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive, dangle a participle, or dare to misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.


There's a Saint for That
patron saints for hire image
There's a saint in every pot, and a prayer card for every condition. Just tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you whom to call and where to send your donations. Let us pray.



      
image of iconic screaming person
      
two lions having it off
      
The Who shortly after pissing on a tall wall
      
American Freedm Party
      
burma shave sign with jingle
        
subliminal Coca-Cola advert
             
image of worldwide web on computer screen
     
image of bicyclist
  
image of handicapped parking sticker
      
man on his knees fucking a tail pipe
      
fly agaric mushroom

Here's to a Brighter Day
banner of brights organization
Brights neither seek nor accept any supernatural "explanations" for life. If that sounds like a bright idea to you, click here.


              
The Pug Bus Blogs On
seven pugs looking out the back of a Dodge Caravan whose hatch is raised
Our fearless editor in briefs holds forth on why he doesn't want to be called a white person; the festering evil that is Mick Jagger; the rise of the alt-middle; his hatred of soccer moms; and a whole lot more!"

Yesterdays' Papers
image of a bunch of newspapers
Read any two of these classic articles from May 2005 and get the third one for free. Pay only for shipping and handling. Offer good while supplies last.

US Prepared for Flu Pandemic Says Bush
A case of deja vu in reverse or what?

Johnny Depp to Read at Hunter S. Thompson Memorial
Johnny wore a wife-beater then he became one.

Mena Suvari Seeks Separation from Mira Sorvino
So who'd you rather . . . or rather not.

Local News
West Chester University Golden Ram  image
West Chester, PA, is home to a public-embarrassment Jackass has-been; a woke university; and the goddamn QVC shopping headquarters. That should be good for a mean-spirited, condescending local news story from time to time.


Pug Bus Quizzes 'n' Polls
road sign with many directions
No rhetorical questions allowed. No penalties for guessing wrong. Find out just how much you do know about Schrödinger’s cat and other neat shit."



Postcards the Book
image
The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs. Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-




You Can't Photoshop This
 

Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."

 

The Pug Bus Interview
image of phil maggitti, the pug bus editor
Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface, because no matter how beautiful a person might be on the inside, you've still got to look at him or her when you're speaking to 'em..Read on.


 
   

image of a gun Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.

 
 
  President Trump Endorses National Pig Latin Day℠
        Nov 20, 2019 - 5:52
       
an image
WASHINGTON, DC—Although he is preoccupied with the impeachment hearings, President Trump made time to tweet his support for National Pig Latin Day early this morning.

"Ationalnay Igpay Atinlay Ayday. Ethay ortsay ofyay observationyay atthay unitesyay atherray anthay ividesday Americansyay. Onay akefay ewsnay erehay."*

"If the boss liked the National Pig Latin Day idea, he's sure to like some of the other national days we plan on celebrating," laughed Phil Maggitti, editor in briefs of Postcards from the Pug Bus and founder of the What the Hell Day It Is national calendar.

       
an image
Mr. Maggitti then explained that he got the idea for a national day calendar after reading "some of the lame bullshit that gets celebrated on its very own precious day on other such calendars." In this month alone, he said, "America has paused to celebrate National Family PJ Day, National Spicy Hermit Cookie Day, and National Play Monopoly Day. Gives me a chubby at the thought of observing National Cranberry Relish Day (11/22) and National Mason Jar Day (11/30). Thank god for thirty-day months, eh?"

In his neverending devotion to the crude and the obscure, Mr. Maggitti said he "plans to lift the rock off persons, places, things, ideas, or felonies that twist the knickers of all the nine-to-fivers and social media scolds in this country. We'll be celebrating taints, loogies, lighting farts, mass murderers, and just about anything that earns a trigger warning somewhere."

-------------------------------Das Ende-------------------------------

*In case you're interested, here's what the president said above: "National Pig Latin Day. The sort of observation that unites rather than divides Americans. No fake news here."

This translation was derived using The Client-Side Pig Latin Translator, which explains Pig Latin in two simple rules:

       
an image
1. If a word begins with a consonant, move the first consonant or group of consonants to the end of the word and add "ay." For example, "dusty" becomes "usty-day" and "choice" becomes "oice-chay."

2. If a word begins with a vowel, leave it there and just add "yay," "hay," "way," or "ay" to the end of the word, depending on your regional dialect.
   

© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked.

Humor Feed Banner
Red Bull Logo