postcards from the pug bus
lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004


Welcome to the Alt-Middle's favorite satire site
What sort of fool brings a knife to a gun fight?
Election 2020: a never was vs. a never should be...make your vote count, don't vote, it's a mope's game
“The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.” (Winston Churchill)
Let's defund the parking meter police
What doesn't kill you will weaken you
So how does felt experience arise out of non-sentient matter, anyway?
"Che stronzi sono le persone." (T. Soprano)


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The Book of Daze℠
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Who gives a shit about National Bubble Bath Day? We surely don't. National Find a Rainbow Day? Fuck that, too. For the really fun days, the ones that nobody else bothers to celebrate, visit . . . The Book of Daze℠.

Your Daily Ganjascope
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Sagittarius (11/22 - 12/21): Your love of Calypso's Grape Fizz live resin carts conspire to produce a full-blown paradoxical reaction to life. Whenever you vape it up, dandruff shampoo turns you into a blizzard with feet. Cough medication makes you hack and sputter like a flooded outboard motor. Deodorant produces a rancid, road-kill aroma about your personal zones. I'd lay off the Beano, contraceptive devices, and hemorrhoid preparations if I were you. More Ganjascopes

The Grammar Prick
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Meaner than a dried-up, old-biddy Language Arts teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive or if you dare misuse penultimate. Visit The Grammar Prick.


Postcards the Book
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The book that inspired a website was written by someone who was actually raised by pugs. Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-


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Some photos cannot be shopped. They are perfect just the way god made them. Such perfection does not happen by accident, and wise, indeed, is the man who says "you can't photoshop this."

The Fuck It List
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Ten Things You Should Quit While Not Going Gently into That Good Night

  1. Organized Religion
  2. Voting
  3. Seat Belts
  4. Making Sure Your Zipper's Up
  5. Paying for Music and Movies
  6. Apologizing for Shit You Didn't Do
  7. Pissing Indoors All the Time
  8. Hauling Your Damn Grandkids Around
  9. Stupid-Ass, Dip-Shit, Old-Fart Hats
10. Bathing or Showering Regularly

Is Obesity Weighing Down the Soul?
Sep 20, 2020 - 4:55
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WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa–The results of a study published in the November issue of Applied Psychological Measurement suggest that the obesity epidemic popping seams and buttons all over the United States is having a quantifiable impact on the human soul.

The study, conducted by researchers at the Johns Hopkins University School of Social Psychometrics, was designed to replicate a century-old study that had reported the weight of the human soul as 21 grams.

In that 1907 study, Duncan MacDougall, a physician from Haverhill, Massachusetts, tested the hypothesis that souls possess physical weight by measuring the weight loss of six patients at the moment of death (when the soul "leaves" the body for an undisclosed destination). One of the six subjects in this experiment lost 21.3 grams.

Dr. MacDougall's work is regarded as flawed because of its small sample size, primitive methodology, and the fact that only one of the six outcomes upheld the hypothesis. That effort won't get you a prize in even the smallest circus; but despite its rejection by the scientific community, Dr. MacDougall's experiment took wings, giving birth to the notion, which is still believed by many Americans, that humans lose 21 grams at death: the weight of the soul.

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Thanks to advances in mattress technology, the Johns Hopkins team was able to measure the weight of 256 randomly selected persons immediately before and after "passing." Their average weight loss was 27.6 grams—an increase of 6.3 grams (29.5%) over the results of Dr. MacDougall's study.

"Honestly," said Johns Hopkins research chief Edgar Baristodas, M.D., Ph.D., "we did not anticipate a result suggesting that the soul possesses weight, much less that the soul has apparently gained weight since 1907."

Dr. Baristodas, who candidly admitted that the study had been designed to "burn up grant money so we would't have to return it," did not care to speculate about the reason for the soul's weight gain.

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"I'm a psychometrician, not a psychologist or someone in the soft sciences where feelings are more and more being elevated to the level of facts."

Dr. Baristodas did confirm that he had applied for a grant from the Heritage Foundation to determine whether black souls weigh more than white souls.

"We've all heard the cliches [about black people having more soul]," said Dr.Baristodas, "but no one has yet to put that claim to a scientific test."
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West Chester, PA, is home to a public-embarrassment Jackass has-been; a virtue-signalling, marching-band university; and the goddamn QVC shopping headquarters. That should be good for a stupid local news story from time to time.

The Pug Bus Blogs On
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Our editor in briefs holds forth on why he doesn't want to be called a white person; the evil that is Mick Jagger; and more!"

The Pug Bus Quiz Challenge
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No rhetorical questions allowed. No penalties for guessing wrong. Find out just how much you do know about Schrödinger’s cat and other neat shit."

The Pug Bus Interview
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Enjoy the interviews nobody else has the sack to do. We aren't afraid to stop totally at the surface.Read on.



Sites for Sore Eyes
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Discordianism--the one religion to have if you're having more than one—or or if you're having none at all.

High Times--wanna know what Super Silver Haze is going for near you? Wanna wade your way through a growing shit heap of trendy, female-empowered, social warrior nonsense to find out?

Pirate Bay--indefatigible, unsinkable, and attitude out the ass; still the one-stop shoplifting stop

Soulseek--no spoofs, no lurkers, just good clean music files for free. To hell with those overpriced streaming services. As the Buddha says, "Stream your own shit, mother-fucker."

Spectrum Labs-need to pass a piss test?

Vaults of Erowid-before you drop it, chop it, snort it, or vape it, consult the druggie's bible; your brain with thank you for the effort

ExpressVPN--sturdy, impregnable fortress. It's the VPN service that we here at the Pug Bus use. Don't go digital shoplifting without it.